You love your desire more than what’s desired

Nietzcshe said ” You love your desire more than what is desired”

Jigar Moradabadi also echoed something similar.He says :

मिल के भी जो नहीं मिलता,टूट कर दिल उसी से मिलता है

That which I have but I don’t possess,My heart keeps longing for..

I have pondered over this for a long time and put it to test on several image087occasions in my life.It is quite a profound statement when critically examined.The object of our desire is more important or the desire itself ? If the object of our desire was the one driving our thoughts and actions then it should cease to fire our senses when it is not around or we have lost all hope of getting it.But it does not happen.

बेनाम सा ये दर्द ठहर क्यूं नहीं जाता

ज़ो बीत गया है वो गुज़र क्यूं नहीं जाता

This nameless pain has no end

It has happened so why I can’t get over it

सब कुछ तो है क्या ढूंढ्ती रहती हैं निगाहें

क्या बात है मैं वक़्त पे घर क्यूं नहीं जाता

I have what I want,So what Do I seek ?

I don’t know why I can’t go home On time

We continue to write sad songs in the memory of our beloved,we continue to sulk over the house that we could not buy ,we continue to feel bad about the business school we could not get into.Isn’t it rational for the mind to just stop thinking about something that is not there and does not even present an opportunity for it to be there in  future.What stops the mind to be rational is its inability to distinguish between a world that is real and outside and the one which it has created for itself.

I have found that over a period of time it becomes a habit of the mind and it feels insecure about letting it go.”I think therefore I am” so if I stop thinking I may cease to be.Thinking and being lost in memories is minds favorite past time and it clings on to it as finding something new and fresh may require venturing new territories.The mind gets comfortable with the thought and then there are aids like Alcohol which make the longing even more pleasurable and effortless.

फिर वही शाम वही गम वही तनहाई है

दिल को बेहलाने तेरी याद चली आयी है

its the same old evening,the same old sorrow,the same old loneliness

Your memories are here to give me company …..

Another aspect of this behavior is that the anger one feels about having lost out helps in inspiring creativity.Look at poets,artists,painters and writers.It seems that as if they will let go of their desire they will not be able to create anything new.Their inspiration is the thought that I got a raw deal and therefore the anger and the pain.

Ultimately the mind becomes so selfish and addicted to pain that it starts to get a kind of sadistic pleasure in indulging itself in misery.Once it knows that from this dark abyss stems its ability to cull out gems of art  there is no turning back.It starts feeding on pain.It looks forward to the lonely evening when it will be alone and by itself.

In the company of  its best friends pain,anger,misery,loneliness it revels and dances in a kind of satanic abandon.And in this gathering there is place for no one else ..not even the one for which this festival has been conjured.

रंज से खूंगर हुआ इंसां तो मिट जाता है रंज

मुश्किलें हम पर पडी इतनी के आसां हो गयीं

When you get used to pain,it vanishes

When troubles are many, they stop to trouble